Three Men in a Tub

This one's for Lilylarkin - it was her idea.



Deagol, Smeagol, and ... Neagol?

(Don't even get me started on technical problems! It's a gag sketch!)

Effects of Walton Wassail

I would like to take this opportunity to apologize for any irritation caused by Lilylarkin and me at the New Year's Eve/Return of the King party held last week. We were seized in fits of supressed laughter for most of the movie ... and it's not a comedy. By way of recompense, here is what we were laughing about:

HYSTERICALLY FUNNY THINGS ABOUT RETURN OF THE KING

- Smeagol, Deagol and Nagle – see below.

- The puffy pink orc, according to Lilylarkin, is the head accountant at New Line, who said "Over budget" one too many times, and incurred the wrath of Peter Jackson, who dunked his head in acid, while yelling hysterically "Say it! Say we're not over budget!" The resultant physical and psychological scarring made him perfect for the role.

- There is an orc at Osgiliath who makes the exact same noise as the Galapagos flightless cormorant in Master and Commander. This led to the following logical crossover quotes:
BLAKENEY: Shall we catch one?
STEPHEN: A pair of them, I should think... and then you can present their offspring to the king.
[flash forward to STEPHEN and BLAKENEY presenting their specimens to the king]
ARAGORN: Uh... thanks.
ORCS: YAARGH!
...
Stephen climbs the hill, beckoned by the call and finds ... AN ORC! Exciting duel sequence ensues.
...
"Well, the orc's flightless... it's not going anywhere." Plink-a pink plink!

- Upon viewing the extended King of the Dead sequence, Lilylarkin mused that, in fact, it was Trading Spaces: Zombie Edition.
· Aragorn and company walk into the bone-strewn gloomy cave: "Hildie! What have you done to my KITCHEN?!"
· The avalanche of skulls caused us both to wonder whatever became of all the other bones... I realized that the army had, in fact, consisted entirely of heads with feet like in the milk ads that have been showing recently (sample).

- This one actually dates from last year when we saw the movie in the theatre, but it made us laugh just the same:
When Denethor runs from the crypt in flames, instead of saying "Thus passes Denethor," Gandalf should sing
There he goes
There he goes again
Like a ball of flame
Falling to his death
Falling to his dea-ea-ea-ea-eath...

- At the Grey Havens, Frodo leaves in much the same manner as Poochie left the Itchy & Scratchy Show: "I must go now. My home planet needs me."

- "I plan to pay more attention to fantasy literature from now on. I had no idea the study of fantasy literature could advance the art of naval warfare."

Everybody's Growing Up Around Me

My best friend from when I was a wee bairn in California is getting married. Married. Madness. Sweet madness, no doubt, but still...

Got my DVDs, my books, and my cats ... all set for Old Maidenhood. ;)