Brace yourself.

[tealin]

I am going to rant for a bit in a generally cranky mood. If you prefer Happy Tealin, please come back some other time.

For the sake of time and space:


Participating in church choir is probably as close as I'll ever come to surrendering to the Benedictine Rule with its obedience and humility because my goodness is it ever infuriating, at times. The leader knows so little about music, gives the pianist such a hard time, can't sing much of anything, and is super controlling in a mincing, passive-agressive way that really grates on my nerves. This might be bearable if the choice of music was interesting and/or appealing, but most of the time it's hopelessly boring, dangerously saccharine, or both. One of the perennial favourites is an insipid song with a piano accompaniment that sounds like the tinkly muzak they always play in the background at the Asian supermarket near work, and whose lyrics are no better:
We believe in God
And we all need Jesus
We believe in God
And we all need Jesus

Sing to me now
Words that are true
So all in this place can know it

We believe in God
And we all need Jesus
We believe in God
And we all need Jesus
We believe in God
And we all need Jesus

Don't be afraid
To know who you are
Don't be afraid to show it

We believe in God
And we all need Jesus
We believe in God
And we all need Jesus
We believe in God
And we all need Jesus
(repeat chorus about SEVENTEEN TIMES until your brain starts to dribble out your ears)

AAAARGH!! MAKE IT STOP!! The words don't MEAN anything! It's the musical equivalent of cotton candy! You take one of the most profound philosophies in the world and reduce it to feel-good catchphrases!

I was going to work on my animation this weekend. Various events have conspired against me. On top of this, I did a bunch of housework yesterday morning so that I could spend the rest of the weekend unharassed but since then the house has gotten all dirty again and if I don't help clean it up I'll be a lazy unhelpful bum who doesn't pull my own weight. GRRR!

Comments

If it makes you feel better

[(Anonymous)]

2700 is closed at 7800 . . . Orange cones on 215 . . . construction on Redwood . . . semi crash on 15 has shut down southbound traffic . . .

Re: If it makes you feel better

[twirlynoodle.livejournal.com]

Doesn't make me feel better at all, actually. Somehow, I find that the traffic situation in Salt Lake County affects me very little either way.

[buttfacemakani.livejournal.com]

HA i hear you on the church music... man there are some bad ones out there. Just because it's praise and worship dosen't make it GOOD. Some people have a really hard time comprehending that. ..But MAN the song you posted really takes the cake @_@. And I thought repeating 'Shine Jesus Shine' 50 times over was bad..

[twirlynoodle.livejournal.com]

THAT'S ANOTHER ONE! The choir leader LOVES that one! It got vetoed on Easter by the combined choirs that did the Vigil so she insisted on doing it for the next three weeks!! GAH! And with clapping! It's songs like that that rule out the possibility of me ever attending an Evangelical church (not to mention matters of theology, but that's another topic...). On the rare occasion I've been dragged along to one, I have to spend a couple hours listening to my medieval CDs when I get home just to get it out of my system. I may be ruthlessly uh-hip but you'd think I'd be going to the right church for that...

Yeah, there are some pretty good modern ones. I like Marty Haugen's tunes especially. Unfortunately, it's too complicated to learn anything new so we never do, and I've given up suggesting things.

[buttfacemakani.livejournal.com]

HA oh the clapping..

haha yeah man.. directors are some of the most hard headed people i've even been in contact with..
ha but yeah, i definately can only go to the contemperary service at my chuch so many times.. guess i'm just glad my church has both x).

[lydaclunas.livejournal.com]

OMG, "Shine, Jesus, Shine"! Just the mere thought of it makes me feel queasy! *has horrible flashbacks to Catholic school "prayer and music" class*

So, yes. Another sympathiser who understands the pain of bad church music. Fortunately I am currently in a choir where the music is half decent (though I am getting rather fed up with "Jesus Christ is Risen Today". Hurry up, Pentecost, and let's get back to Ordinary Time).

[rj-anderson.livejournal.com]

AAAARGH!! MAKE IT STOP!! The words don't MEAN anything! It's the musical equivalent of cotton candy! You take one of the most profound philosophies in the world and reduce it to feel-good catchphrases!

Amen, preach it, sister.

It never ceases to amaze me the insubstantial dreck that becomes popular in Christian circles. And the plain bad theology in some of these "praise and worship" choruses. On the other hand, there are some really lovely modern hymns being written by people like Stuart Townend and (when he's having a good day) Graham Kendrick (though "Shine, Jesus Shine" was NOT a good day, IMO).

[(Anonymous)]

Our church goes to the other extreme... it did this summer "arts camp" with little kids and wanted second graders, in one week, to create, cast, and perform their own skits. Yeah, right. I got stuck with writing the skits, bullying the kids into learning their parts, instrumenting freeze-tag games...
Our church had the same little kids, this time ranging from preschool to fourth grade, singing complicated latin hymns with multiple parts. Can't someone just come up with decent songs that are interesting, but not in quadruple-part minor Latin?

[octaveleap.livejournal.com]

I, too, find it aggrivating to hear such terrible music in Church. Because the truth is, there are COUNTLESS sacred songs that are absolutely SPECTACULAR. Let's face it, the Christian faith has inspired some of the most terrifying AND the most glorious songs ever written. If you've ever participated in something like Sacred Harp singing, that kind of music alone is enough to give you faith. And even a symple hymn can be breathtaking if it's done right.

This entry kind of reminds me of another you entry you posted a while back about how sermons should appeal on a more intellectual level. I think that's true too. I think that should also apply to the music they have. There's beautiful sacred music from all different time periods that nobody's using. The motto you thought of, "Christianity- It Just Makes Sense" could go along well with "Christianity- look how we've inspired so many brilliant musicians."

[twirlynoodle.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that's another thing – there's quite a large number of people in the congregation and yet somehow the choir consists of an inordinate number of people who can't really sing. (I'm being cruel, but that's the way it is.) There have to be more singers per capita than this, and people who have a basic knowledge of how to read music, at least. I mean, how many kids take piano lessons? Around here, a lot. So they'd still be able to read music. There have to be more talented people in a congregation of 200 than the five or six up in the choir. They probably don't want to have anything to do with it because, well, it's crummy, but it won't get any better until larger numbers of more skilled people join up!

[sigh]

[veronikamg.livejournal.com]

I can relate to this. :-) I was in a church choir when I was a kid. We had a tyrannical choir leader who forced me to sing base even though I told her every time I couldn't sing that low. I asked to be transferred to the "main" part of the choir, but no. She had me PANTOMIME in church! She couldn't throw me out of the choir as long as I paid, she couldn't deny me coming to church, but she had the power to tell me to keep quiet and just pretend to be singing.

The year before that we had no leader, just the piano guy. Despite his enormous knowledge of music (organist in our church as he was) he spent 6 months teaching us "I Lift my Eyes to the Mountain".

I think choirs are the same wherever you are.

[lyssa-greenfire.livejournal.com]

Ooh, some of the hymns we sing in our church just drive me nuts. The choir director seems to deliberately force songs resembling carnival music on us...every...freaking...Sunday. There's this one song, He Lives, or something, and I swear, that thing chills me to the bone! It repeats...and repeats...and repeats. Grr...

Conclusion

[romani-lily.livejournal.com]

This is how the phantom got back at society after getting screwed by it. He has possesed the minds of all christian composers and makes us feel his pain every sunday because of it. Curse you. . .CURSE YOU!!!

Re: Conclusion

[twirlynoodle.livejournal.com]

Wow! Haven't seen you around here for a while! You must be feeling better...

[ubiquitouspitt.livejournal.com]

Had the same sort of problem with a family I lived with... One day I weeded their entire acre-large back garden but got fussed out later for being lazy. It eventually came to pass that I played the family maid while they sat around watching television all day.

[chinchilla82.livejournal.com]

Go and listen to Mozart's Requiem. That will help push any silly piddling church songs right out of your head. Dies ire, baby.