Taxes, thus Death
Sep. 15th, 2020 02:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tealinI have been working on my taxes. September isn't the usual tax season, but I get a 6-month extension on my US taxes on account of living abroad, which puts the due date in October. (I haven't heard anything about a Covid extension as was offered to domestic tax filers, so am proceeding as usual.) UK taxes aren't due until January, but while I've got the books open and the numbers in my head, it makes sense to do them at the same time and beat the rush.
On one hand, international tax treaties mean I don't actually have to pay taxes in both countries, but the US can't bear the thought of not knowing all the financial details of one of its peons, so I have to file them just the same, and pay for the privilege of doing so.
Usually this process takes three days or so, because I need to do at least one currency conversion on all my income and receipts, and on each month's interest on every one of my international bank accounts, even when they're pennies, according to the exchange rate on the day. It's a lot of sums. Most people in my position would be working for some big firm which has sponsored them to work abroad, and can afford to pay someone else to prepare their taxes. That is very much not the case with me. I couldn't even justify accountants' fees by claiming they get me a higher refund, because I'm self-employed – I don't get a refund! Besides which, the vast majority of accountants in the UK refuse to handle US tax returns. There is a very good reason for this: they are not idiots.
This year has been even more complicated than usual as I have a mountain of receipts from my Antarctic trip, and the various personal and global madnesses of 2020 have kept me from updating my books since this time last year. Consequently, that process has taken a whole week. I sat down to file today, but quickly ended up in a dead end with HMRC, where I needed my calculated tax amount to fill out a supplemental form, but couldn't calculate it until I'd supplied the end result of said supplemental form. So I moved on to filing my US taxes, but everything is different this year: Instead of dropping in my total income and expenses and confirming that I'm still paying taxes abroad, I now have to itemise everything and move up to the higher filing package to do so. 'It's OK!' says the filing company, 'You can pay for it out of your refund!' I don't get a refund.
I have support requests in for both things, but goodness knows if/when any response will come back. I was looking forward to having everything finally squared away today, but it looks like I'll be in Revenue Purgatory for another week at least. I could keep plugging away at my US return, supplying what I know is ultimately irrelevant information because it's all going to total $0 at the end anyway, but frankly, if I have to make the numbers dance for another week I am going to be spending more time Googling 'how to fake your own death' than getting anything done. Meanwhile my email falls more and more atrociously behind, and I haven't done any work on what is, theoretically, my actual job.
So I'm putting the books away. I still have a month until the US taxes are due, and what little I can do on that front I could do just as well when my query gets a response. If there's any comfort to be had, here, it's that next year should be a lot simpler: no research trip, no teaching in a country that docks its own taxes before sending me the cheque (thanks Switzerland), and I've stocked up on the work supplies I need for the foreseeable future. I really wish I could move ahead with the decks clear, but that's obviously not an option this year.
Every time I go through this process I come out hating the world, but planning to be back in Canada soon, I am extra determined to go down to ONE bank and stay in ONE country, and pray my family quits the US so I can finally kick off that ball and chain. I liked paying Canadian taxes, and that's the one country I belong to which doesn't ask me to do it every year!
On one hand, international tax treaties mean I don't actually have to pay taxes in both countries, but the US can't bear the thought of not knowing all the financial details of one of its peons, so I have to file them just the same, and pay for the privilege of doing so.
Usually this process takes three days or so, because I need to do at least one currency conversion on all my income and receipts, and on each month's interest on every one of my international bank accounts, even when they're pennies, according to the exchange rate on the day. It's a lot of sums. Most people in my position would be working for some big firm which has sponsored them to work abroad, and can afford to pay someone else to prepare their taxes. That is very much not the case with me. I couldn't even justify accountants' fees by claiming they get me a higher refund, because I'm self-employed – I don't get a refund! Besides which, the vast majority of accountants in the UK refuse to handle US tax returns. There is a very good reason for this: they are not idiots.
This year has been even more complicated than usual as I have a mountain of receipts from my Antarctic trip, and the various personal and global madnesses of 2020 have kept me from updating my books since this time last year. Consequently, that process has taken a whole week. I sat down to file today, but quickly ended up in a dead end with HMRC, where I needed my calculated tax amount to fill out a supplemental form, but couldn't calculate it until I'd supplied the end result of said supplemental form. So I moved on to filing my US taxes, but everything is different this year: Instead of dropping in my total income and expenses and confirming that I'm still paying taxes abroad, I now have to itemise everything and move up to the higher filing package to do so. 'It's OK!' says the filing company, 'You can pay for it out of your refund!' I don't get a refund.
I have support requests in for both things, but goodness knows if/when any response will come back. I was looking forward to having everything finally squared away today, but it looks like I'll be in Revenue Purgatory for another week at least. I could keep plugging away at my US return, supplying what I know is ultimately irrelevant information because it's all going to total $0 at the end anyway, but frankly, if I have to make the numbers dance for another week I am going to be spending more time Googling 'how to fake your own death' than getting anything done. Meanwhile my email falls more and more atrociously behind, and I haven't done any work on what is, theoretically, my actual job.
So I'm putting the books away. I still have a month until the US taxes are due, and what little I can do on that front I could do just as well when my query gets a response. If there's any comfort to be had, here, it's that next year should be a lot simpler: no research trip, no teaching in a country that docks its own taxes before sending me the cheque (thanks Switzerland), and I've stocked up on the work supplies I need for the foreseeable future. I really wish I could move ahead with the decks clear, but that's obviously not an option this year.
Every time I go through this process I come out hating the world, but planning to be back in Canada soon, I am extra determined to go down to ONE bank and stay in ONE country, and pray my family quits the US so I can finally kick off that ball and chain. I liked paying Canadian taxes, and that's the one country I belong to which doesn't ask me to do it every year!
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