[Shudder]

[tealin]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!

The Barbie Diaries??!?!!?!

(Almost as frightening and disgusting as that email, Disneyboy ... almost.)

Comments

[disneyboy.livejournal.com]

I didn't completely freak out until I saw the CREEPY cover design (almost real, but with those dead-looking, painted-on identical blue eyes, like mannequins) and then watched the TRAILER! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! You're right, wounds will eventually heal (or at least skin grafts and prothesises may be available) but, burn her, cut her hair, pull off her head, throw her in the dumpster - Barbie is FOREVER! She and her legion fans of giggling ninnies simply won't go AWAY! They're EVERYWHERE - in the toy store, on the top-seller shelves of video stores, on book shelves - even in this post-feminist age her popularity hasn't waned at all - she's just getting bigger!
The hard thing is, I'd love to banish this ridiculous, unhealthy outdated role model for emerging female identities from planet earth...But my little niece loves her. She loves all the recent books, toys, and movies (like "Barbie as Rapunzel" and "Barbie as The Prince and the Pauper" - which, for what they are, I have to say, are pretty well done) She loves her at least as much as Cinderella (if Barbie did a version of that, she'd probably love it more) And speaking of Disney, let's face it: a lot of people blame Walt for making all of these movies, creating this "princess" craze - as an employee, I'm very sensitive to this! I love those old movies even if I don't hold with all of the old-fashioned values they might promulgagte (don't worry about anything, just be good - and be a good housekeeper - and always take it on the chin, and someday a MAN will come and solve all of your problems! As long as you're really beautiful, anyway!). I know my niece will go crazy over this video, and I do worry about what she will take away from it - how old is Barbie supposed to be in this, anyway? Her voice sounds like she's 30 or 40! I bet they're keeping it purposefully vague to broaden the appeal! (I do NOT like the idea of girls who look like they could be 12 or 13 getting serious about dating) What I really hate is this pervasive sexualization of really young girls, be it their Bratz dolls or latest Jordache kids line, featuring preteens in heavy makeup, making it look like being boy crazy and dressing like a prostitute as early as possible is a must (to say nothing of what the "Bratz" line says about materialism - get a cell phone and a credit card and your life will be so much better! Um...wait, my life IS a lot better with a cell phone and a credit card. But they need to be taught to use them responsibly!) And have you listened to some of the stuff they play on "Radio Disney"?? I've caught my little niece (who admittedly probaly has no idea what she's taking about) singing some pretty scandalous lyrics! This dance class that she was in a couple of years ago that got her to do these little bump-and-grind, bootie-shaking routines - it seemed a little obscene to me! It also bugs me (almost as much) that she loves crap like Cinderella II and Little Mermaid II as much or more than the originals (if she has to get entertainment with questionable mixed messages, at least it should be high quality with good production values!) But there is no way I could deprogram the princess out of her even if I really tried (I think her aunt has!)- she was literally BORN a super-feminine, princess-loving girly-girl - if you locked her in the attic and only gave her dirty coveralls to wear and rocks and hammers to play with, she would somehow fashion them into a frilly dress (complete with tiara, high-heeled slippers and fairy wand) and a barbie doll. As much as I may despise what she's embracing, I can understand why her parents don't want to deny her what seems to make her absolutely ecstatic (except those stupid direct-to-video sequels! I wish they would draw the line there, the traitors! Well, now they're not going to make anymore, anyway, so I have the last laugh!) Luckily she is also VERY smart and doing well in school - learning a second language, reading a lot, having very sophistcated conversations...so maybe she will be able to sort all of this nonsense out herself when she's old enough to know better. I hope.

[azvolrien.livejournal.com]

Cinderella II: *COUGH COUGH HAAAAACCHHH*

[disneyboy.livejournal.com]

Heh - if you think that's bad, wait until you see "Cinderella III", where the evil stepmother steals the fairy godmother's wand and makes it like the first movie never happened.
No, I am NOT MAKING THIS UP.
Be afraid. Be VERY afraid.

[azvolrien.livejournal.com]

That's even more of an Abomination unto Nuggan!

[disneyboy.livejournal.com]

Yeah...apparently the Wicked Stepmother changes things so the slipper fits on one of her daughters instead (so the prince has to marry her? Who knows? Who cares? Just run away!)

[twirlynoodle.livejournal.com]

Weeeeeeeellllllll... they could go back to the original story and have the stepmother chop off the heel/toes of her daughter to make the shoe fit. THAT would be something to see.

Or they could make it some sort of crazy time travel challenge where Cinderella has to battle the grandfather paradox and the Trousers of Time and all that good stuff – That would be something to see as well! And so far out of the target demographic that it might possibly come at it from the other direction!
Small child upon being introduced to time travel story: 'Mommy, my brain hurts!'

Hope is the greatest of all treasures. And mankind's undoing. I am clutching at straws. I'll just go with your advice and run away.

[disneyboy.livejournal.com]

LOL!!